Funniest racing experiences

[Lee Martin]

come on then, cough up...

whats the funniest thing you have done, seen or been part of in your racing life????

make me laugh and win a prize.......

the best one will get the prize at ozwastree..................

:D

[Lee]

I saw wayne lander (some might know him) glue his eye lid shut once :D

I have also seen him being escorted away from stafford by police:D

[losixxx]

russ woodhouse trying to marshall at southpot national a few years ago, with his trousers round his ankles, mind you don't know if thats funny or horrid:D

[_sleigh_]

the best one will get the prize at ozwastree..................

That's nice, you're going to give away your BX. :D

[MK999]

Over the PA system during my 2nd ever final (got bumped up from my first ever) leading it iirc "Car 3 we have your transponder at race control" :p

[mole2k]

One night at our local club a guy broke a shock tower and didnt have any replacements. So he tried to superglue it and ended up having to go to casulty to get the car removed from his fingers.

[Lee]

When racing tourers i hit a marshall flat out on the striaght my car didnt even slow down but he landed on his shoulders:D

[Southwell]

Bathy turned up....

[dave g]

one of the nationals many yrs ago..they had a rugby club bar onsite.

watching ben riley throw up in a waste paper bin in the rugby club bar blind drunk,then trying to hide a smashed ashtray under a rug infront of the fire hoping no one would see it... then outside after closing..daring ben riley to race dave snee up the rugby posts ,i chucked snee up for a head start,he was up and back down as ben just got to the cross bar....just in time to get caught up there and was hauled before the race directors the next morning on raceday and was soooooo close to getting kicked out of the meeting and the brca!

im sure graham and jim remember it..funniest thing ive seen.

dave

[bigred5765]

joe cockill marshaling at the euros when he slipped on the the table top rolled down it in front of the oncoming cars, and to top it of his trainer did a slow motion slide down the table top after him,would you belive no one shouted MARSHAL

[mole2k]

A more recent one at our club, a marshall slipped on the floor while marshalling and landed flat on his back and was run over by the top 2 cars before he could move out of the way.

[_JP_]

what about cutting spikes off tyres and saving them to glue on for times of needing more grip:rolleyes:

I'm not saying it was me ....... :D

[Lee Martin]

liking the finger gluing and hospital one...but nothing has amazed me yet

[Alfonzo]

Wayyy back in time - The Team Tanaplan Grand Prix circa 1990. Big open event, 150 drivers, loads of prizes. The race director called out for a driver called Billy Bellringer to report to race control. Billy Bellringer???!
Must have been the stress of the moment but me and my mate couldn't stop laughing for the rest of the day, although It loses a little in recollection admittedly ;)

[Lee Martin]

hahaha......................

the Doc at the euros always makes me laugh!!!

amazing!

in austria when he told everyone the mayor died.....

so harsh.....but toooo funny....tricky just started laughing lol

[spenner]

Not amazing but funny when you look back!!!

I remember many years ago me and Pidge was mucking around in Mannie Panesar's brand new Gazebo. We managed too fall and snap one of the legs !!! oops.

What was funny now is Mannie was the genuine budget racer, prob took him years to get that Gazebo and we broke it on it's maiden voyage!!

Do you remember that one lee ???
It was at Stotfold

[Nick Goodall]

hahaha......................

the Doc at the euros always makes me laugh!!!

amazing!

in austria when he told everyone the mayor died.....

so harsh.....but toooo funny....tricky just started laughing lol

Why would it not surprise me that Tricky was laughing at that haha ;-)

One thing i do remember hearing about was Craig ramping his Cat 2000 out of the Hotel window (Euro's) - 3rd/4th floor i believe...... Then there was poor old Matt Needham having his car nailed to his table, followed later by it ending up in a tree and not to mention all of his tools and wheels etc super glued to his pit table - that was pretty funny.

Ellis and Sloppy's "incident" at the Kiddy Nat's a few years back, involved a certain someone turning off the other persons Tranny mid-race...... it wasn't at the time but looking back that was really funny (i'm sure Ellis will agree now)

[spenner]

Best thing was Roger 'sooty' Sutcliffe standing racing on rostrum when it fell forward you heard a real girly scream and then a thud!!!

Roger broke his arm, someone's dad (Mr Springer) ran over and grabbed poor Roger's broken arm and was squeezing while Roger shreeked in pain asking if he was alright.

[Lee Martin]

thats going back a while.................

mannie the budget boy!!!!!!

[Lee Martin]

what about craggy ramping his pred off the worlds venue in finland?????

tht was awesome!!!

about 150 ft high!!!!!!

[dave g]

i remember tricky setting fire to a certain persons pit table :)

[Lee Martin]

oooo yeh!!!

Jukka!!!

hahahahaha

france was funny....we were throwing stuff between out 6 story windows...then moody threw a melon!!!

made a right mess

[Nick Goodall]

what about craggy ramping his pred off the worlds venue in finland?????

tht was awesome!!!

about 150 ft high!!!!!!

Sh***t yeah how could i forget!! Then the Crazy germans were wanting to set it on fire haha

[Lee]

There was one time when Craig Drescher and steven lander were sharing a room, but down the corridor some danish guys (i think) were also sharing, i think it started off by either steve or craig soaking one of the danish fellas with a bucket of water, then they replied by barging in to their room and nicking all of the bed covers from craigs room which you wouldnt think was too bad but they came back and when craig opened the door they fired a powder fire extinguisher into the room, supposedly craig and steve were hanging out the window completely covered in powder and they still had to sleep the rest of the night with the windows wide open in denmark in january:D

[Kopite]

I supoose my dad being attacked by a pissed 25 stone hell's angel at the Tatton Park weekend meeting years ago, cos he claimed that we (me, Rob Jones and Lee Wyatt) nailed his daughter, was one to remember!!

[Lee]

Lee Wyatt, i remember when he shot someone on the rostrum with a BB gun:D


Did you nail her stan?

[Kopite]

nah man, it was a hell's angel's daughter for god's sake, she was scary (i think Rob did though)! I was only 15/16 at the time, and was more concerned about not throwing up on my 3 cans of carlsberg special brew.

that same night, Lee was telling everyone in Tatton Park that there was a party going on at our tent, and free beer for everyone. We eventually stumbled back to the track area an hour later to notice hundreds of people looking for our tent. Genius!!

[Lee]

I haven`t seen him in years, the last i heard he had got some 15 year old up the duff:D

[Kopite]

lol, u know him well then!

Does anyone remember a Border Counties meeting at Bridgenorth years ago when the rostrum was on a wasp's nest? During the final, i think the wasps decided to go at us, me and Lee screamed off the rostrum like little girls within seconds, and i think Phil Channon was the only person left on the rostrum, covered in wasps but not even remotely fussed. What a guy!!

[Lee]

Leg-end:D

I remember when neil cragg fell through the rostrum at ellesmere port, i think he was probably only about 10 then.

Do you remember gavin stephenson?

[_sleigh_]

lol, u know him well then!

Does anyone remember a Border Counties meeting at Bridgenorth years ago when the rostrum was on a wasp's nest? During the final, i think the wasps decided to go at us, me and Lee screamed off the rostrum like little girls within seconds, and i think Phil Channon was the only person left on the rostrum, covered in wasps but not even remotely fussed. What a guy!!

Remember that one.. think it was the finals meeting.

Think it was the same year Matt Needham and the other factory Schumacher drivers came to test out the Fireblade before it's release.

[Lee Martin]

thts the funniest thing.....the fireblade lol

[Kopite]

hell yeah!

Not sure if i should bring this one up, but remember Andy Jones' dad stamping on a lad's car cos he took Andy out in the race? :D :D :D :D

I remember me and Doddy setting fire to our tent once too :o

[bigred5765]

i remeber a meeting at oulton park race circuit,many years ago when i got accused of racing around the fullsized car circuit with my ople manta, and it was some kid (well know racer now) razzing round on someone's motorbike. me simon pickering and paul mckenna nearly got kicked of the circuit buy some 20 stone skinhead from security

[Lee]

I think Gav is back racing(micros though)

I think lee started this thread because i said about that in another one, that was not a good day, but bloody funny now:D

Last winter some lad had a rag on his table and when he turned his car on something shorted a spark hit the rag and woof! xxxs gone:D :D

So funny, i think he cried:D

[RLGfx]

oh hell yes... i remember that one... at the Ellesmere Port Civic Hall...

FMCC staged a mass walkout, and I think it left one car in the A Final... Wasn't funny at the time, but a bit of wee came out when you brought that one up Stan... :D :D :D :o

Another thing that always makes me laugh is watching stan glue tyres up... never fails to get towel, hands, other tyres glued to everything... I encourage anyone to see it... book your tickets for oswestry now!

[_sleigh_]

Perhaps it's about time I admitted to this now after so many years.

Many years back.. went to a national @ Holbeach and in the middle of the night we decided to "modify" Nick Goodall's pitting tent by removing a few poles and changing it's location.

Remember waking up the following morning to the raised voices of "family" Goodall going ballistic about it.

Sorry Nick, it was funny at the time. :D :rolleyes:


Seem to remember the same trick being played on the Bowaters at a Tiverton National. There was poles everywhere. Infact it seemed to happen to the Bowaters quite regularly. :D :D :D

[Lee Martin]

yes...i did it to the bowaters at bury St edmonds.......

hahahaah

[Chrislong]

We raced a few times in the hall at Bury metro, the one which is burnt to the ground, just during the winter of one year only before they made it an aerobics centre. Anyway, there was this lad called Martin McElroy and he always had to have the best, be the fastest and brag the most but he couldn't drive for toffee, although he liked showing off if chance to.

One meeting after the finals, he took his ZXR out on the outdoor track and sprayed his rear tyres with motorspray, lit them, accelerated and with a burst of flames it went out and drove back to himself again. It was dark so it looked cool.

As a crowd gathered he put more and more spray on, plus whatever else people offered. Until eventually he was driving around a ball of fire and it didn't go out, we all expected it to happen and he couldn't put it out, was hilarious watching him panic. It soon fizzled out, lots of melted bits but the car was still a runner really. Don't think I saw him again.

All in one weekend:

Then there was Gav Crolla, who brought to life an old Pred he had and raced it at Batley (might have been 2002/3). Every race it broke, was so fragile! So after the final which it did finish, he proceeded to jump on it..... and it didn't break, so I think he buried it in his garden.

Then Duncan Lomas too busy drinking to notice airbed over-inflating and going bang, blamed his girlfriend in a drunken rage and threw his credit card at her to get a Taxi home. Gav went and picked the card up "What the f@ck she meant to do with this, wave a Taxi down with it?"

Went to the Pub down the road, all went to the bar and went out to the beer garden. We all put our drinks down on this wooden bench and Stu Mahon was the first to sit down - all the drinks went.

[Lee Martin]

loved tht!! longs in the lead.........

[Lee]

A few years ago we were camping at ashby (on road) one fella was called vernon jones he was a nutter. Because of the rain during the week we were asked to move our cars to the harder ground 50 m away. We all happily did it but vernon pretended not to hear the announcement, when the race director came over to ask him to move his car he pretended again to be deaf, eventually he acknowledged the race director and told him he was deaf (he put the voice on and pulled a face and pointed to his ears for effect) when the director had asked him slowly and clearly vernon got into his car held the revs at about 6000rpm and lifted the clutch, covering the race director, tents, caravans, everything with mud.

We were pissing ourselves but he had to keep the act up all week end, untill he handed in the transponder after his final on the sunday and just said

"cheers mate"

I think if the director had not been behind the desk he would of smacked him:D

[super__dan]

I never got to see this but James Instone (Welshy something on here now) famously in Wales got chucked in a lake. I think they said for making an A final, but secretly just wanted to chuck him in the lake :)

[mole2k]

Another superglue induced tale of woe here!

One season near the start of the TC boom in the late 90's we were running TC's outside with foams, on of the guys in the club decided he wanted to fit some new tyres as they didnt come premounted in those days he had to glue them on. The only glue he had was the super thin cyno, he run the glue around the rim and attached the tyre, unknown to him the glue ran down the tyre and glued all 4 wheels solid to the desk. he went to lift the car up to go race and the table came up with him, in the end he cut the tyres off the desk and had to revert back to the older foams as the new ones had monsterous flatspots :D

[terry.sc]

Reminds me of Chris Hardistys car at the Hereford 1/12th nationals. Took him long enough to find it.

[Nick Goodall]

Perhaps it's about time I admitted to this now after so many years.

Many years back.. went to a national @ Holbeach and in the middle of the night we decided to "modify" Nick Goodall's pitting tent by removing a few poles and changing it's location.

Remember waking up the following morning to the raised voices of "family" Goodall going ballistic about it.

Sorry Nick, it was funny at the time. :D :rolleyes:


Seem to remember the same trick being played on the Bowaters at a Tiverton National. There was poles everywhere. Infact it seemed to happen to the Bowaters quite regularly. :D :D :D


Ahhhh i remember that!! Think my Dad was annoyed as he'd somehow been convinced to part with £800 for that weird marquee / Tent thing which was supposed to only take 5 mins to put up and down :D I guess he wasn't too happy at the thought of someone tampering with his new toy ;)

I think my sister was going out with RichM at the time which might have made it an even more appealing target to you :D

[Lee Martin]

dad hit the nail on the head here.....

jonny, remeber when we were at Bury st edmonds when it was called off....

you dad was packing you stuff into Bone's mums new car.......

cleaning everything, keeping it nice inside and that 4x4 went out and spun the wheels, cakin the inside of your tent, yourself and bones mums new car completing in mud!!

classic!!!

[spenner]

Yer, that was Russell Woodhouse who was driving the other car!!!
My dad went mad, you could see the mud heading towards the car.

It was good when he had to explain that to bones parents!!

[Chris Doughty]

the break between the 4WD and 2WD event at florida worlds, Me, Cree, Tricky and Rennick went to the beach and got some Jet Ski's

we were all hooning around jumping the wakes of boats and the US coast gaurd hard a word with us 'not to go near the other boats'...

Tricky didn't listen...

we were also racing towards a buey, 4 in a line, gradually getting closer and closer to each other, I backed out early, I think Rennick did too, who would have guessed Cree and Trick still full bore, head down, arse up going for the win :rolleyes:

jet Ski;s are ace! :D

[Lee]

I remember a few years ago at a national at tibshelf Craig D and a few others went out on the lash, colin brennan went along so we let down his tent, it turns out he never came back and had tried to stay in dreschers hotel room, the answer was no and craig made him sleep in his car:D

Another time we pulled out all the tent pegs while a fellow racer was out on the pull the lad did well and came back with some bird, we all thought nothing more until the wind picked up and we realised that the lazy sod hadn`t fitted the bedroom compartment to the inside of his tent, the tent flipped over leaving this lads arse going like a bee`s wing on full display to the rest of the campers, he just laughed but the girl was far from impressed :D :D

[Lee Martin]

hahahahahahahaha

[k£v!n]

I remember following this car around that I thought was my car, but actually my car had drove off the track, with the marshal was running after it. Because I thought this other car was mine I was still controlling my car without realising the car I was following wasn’t mine! Hope this makes sense :D

[mole2k]

I remember following this car around that I thought was my car, but actually my car had drove off the track, with the marshal was running after it. Because I thought this other car was mine I was still controlling my car without realising the car I was following wasn’t mine! Hope this makes sense :D

haha I think we've all done that.

At my local club a few years ago one of the members sold his usual body to another person so he could revert back to his previous colour sceme. First race after the body swap he tried to drive the wrong car :D

[rcracer]

At my local club a few years ago one of the members sold his usual body to another person

jeese i wouldnt want to race at your club :D :D :D

[Cruise]

To everyone who missed Neils Jump i can provide some Fotos.
The first shows Craig Drescher shooting the car up the roof the second is the remains of the car. The pic of the jump itself is too bad to be posted,

Cruise

[Alfonzo]

If you look carefully you can see it's broken :D :D

[ashleyb4]

Kevin getting super glue in his eye. lol i laughed so much when he told me.

Also at kiddy regional afterwards i was running my 4wd around and sleigh had a go and i had the steering in reverse so when he turned left it went right and vise versa the worst bit was when he shouted it out infront of everyone. I almost died.

A

[Kopite]

I remember following this car around that I thought was my car, but actually my car had drove off the track, with the marshal was running after it. Because I thought this other car was mine I was still controlling my car without realising the car I was following wasn’t mine! Hope this makes sense :D

I've done that, i'll admit it. Had a sponsor years ago who decided that we should all have exactly the same bodyshell colours. Unfortunately, at one meeting, 4 of us were in the same heat, and it was a mass start, as opposed to a staggered one. After the first corner, i was racing what i thought was my car for 2 laps and thinking 'christ, i'm flying today, and the car's going like a dream'. Then, whoever it actually was crashed, at which point i tried to see where my dad was (to see if he was grumbling to himself about my crash), only to notice him running across the field at full pelt chasing after my car....


...to this day, he still thinks it was interference!!;)

[Kopite]

Kevin getting super glue in his eye. lol i laughed so much when he told me.


unless it was his middle eye, then that's pretty harsh dude :o

[Lee Martin]

cruise....any more pics???

long time ago now!!!

[Nick Goodall]

To everyone who missed Neils Jump i can provide some Fotos.
The first shows Craig Drescher shooting the car up the roof the second is the remains of the car. The pic of the jump itself is too bad to be posted,

Cruise

Excellent, have you got any more pics? That was really funny, i remember the first time it struggled to even make it up and Craig luckily caught it!

[bigred5765]

think craggy has a small vid of it some were

[Cruise]

Okay here are two more -the jump and another closeup of the car.
The rest are pics of the car on the rooftop and Neil posing in front of the Hangar .Sorry for the quality of the jump but the camera was anything but modern.

[Yardeeee]

Man I got a bunch!

1st off... Stoke mid west regional 2002 I think it was... I was marshalling and was in the middle of the track where it was necessary to have a seat. Well I was provided with a chest of drawers to sit on! an old rickety set of wooden draws... it was pourin down with rain, a car crashed so I went to get it... came back, plonked back down on this wooden chest of drawers and felt it rock back... there was the sound of a few snaps as the shelves broke and then the whole structure became a flat pack with me sat in the centre! JP was on the rostrum p*ssin himself, Mossy was in tears, doddy nearly passed out... I'm just gutted no-one filmed it I would love to see it back!

Talking of JP remember the rostrum steps at Stoke indoors dude? I know you hurt yourself and whatever but that wasn't the funniest part. I'll jackanory it for you all...

We're at a winter meetin indoors and usin this metal rostrum with narrow steps... me, mossy, doddy and bog are all stood at the bottom watching, and JP busts his car... moss picks it up and holds it up to him (now let this be a lesson to you for not wondering off the rostrum before race is over!) JP is lookin down at his stricken xx4 instead of looking at the steps... he proceeds to miss the top 1, fly into the air, do a perfect triple salco and land flat on his back right on the middle steps spralled out like jesus! Well we all do our very best to keep a straight face as we can see he's in some pain, when JP stands up and says "those stairs are f**kin dangerous!" well at this point we are all trying not to crease and we would have succeeded if it weren't for the sound of a screeching high pitched "ahhhhhhh haaa haaa haaaa!!! get over!!!" comin from Butch who is stood in the middle of the pits! well that was it... we all just let loose after that... sorry JP ;)

Another time, again i was at the foot of the rostrum steps at an indoor meeting at dudley, and a young kid up at the top crashed and broke his car, turned round and headbutted the wall! that was genius.

also away from the track, I was at a little chef with scott whyman at holbeche 1 year, and whyman tried to steal a coke glass, he put it in the front pocket of his fleece, but coupled with his belly, he got wedged under the table as he was trying to get out from the corral... like a turtle on his back he was stuck... i wanted to help, but couldn't for my tears of laughter!

Yardy

[Lee Martin]

lets have the one of a young neil thn cruise

[millzy]

Funnies, mate there is so many thing we have done or been apart of dude its hard to remember the stuff that you don’t know about.

Years ago, at Hampshire me Jody Denner, Peter Bullen and Lee Taylor got waited on vodka and Fosters, cant remember who but some one came up with the idea to follow the kiddie’s railway line , so off the 3 of us went staggering about until we came to a small 4ft fence, now if you don’t know who Lee Taylor is you will need to know that “sticks” as we call him has mutable sucrose’s and has to walk with the aid of crutches . so as “Sticks” cant climb over the fence we decide to throw him over, as we do so the leg of his jeans gets caught and “Sticks” is there hanging up side down the other side of this fence call for help, to witch we shout ok mate… and throw over his crutches.

Also , one year at Southport RRCI my brother and I had no choice but to kip in the tent with H, H was going full bore with his snoring after and hour we could take any more it was late and we both need sleep, so I got up picked up a full 2ltr bottle of coke and smacked H on the stomach- no zero effect apart from him rolling onto his side and grunting

[Lee Martin]

yardy takes the new lead with tht...

[Cruise]

Here you go- remember year of 99

[ashleyb4]

Need i say any more vermin and jonesy

http://www.northernracer.com/burynational/rodeo/7.htm

http://www.oople.com/rc/photos/burynational2007/2wd/imagepages/OOP_8423.html

and

http://www.northernracer.com/burynational/rodeo/11.htm

A

[Lee Martin]

hahahahah tht last pics ace

[Northy]

hahahahah tht last pics ace

:o I'm getting well shafted there! :eh?:

[Lee]

You loved it:D

[Lee Martin]

he did....

[Northy]

Yeh, I did :D :D :D :D

G

[Stu]

He really did - really.

[flipside]

Euro's 97 in Barcelona, there was a fire on one of the hills, and it came so close that everybody started packing and put their stuff on the racetrack!

[_JP_]

LOL Tom, surprised you didn't tell the one about me at the F2's when I fell off the wall, I still maintain those steps were dangerous at stoke! :mad: :)

but the draws was funny :)


What about the Euros in France and C for cookie, poor Jonesy eating that cookie after it had been up numerous arses, or the times we were filling our own glasses in the hotel, beer prices were scandalous so we had to improvise!
Come to think of it the Euros was one long laugh :)


We may need a confessions thread with these pulling and moving tents lol,

I remember moving some ones car at a himley show with the Dudley boys, I think it was one of the Derby/Ilkeston lads, we picked up this metro and hid it behind a tree, it was a fair old carry, one of the lads Mark Norris I think, managed to bend the rear arch, I was in a load of trouble with Butch's mom and dad as I used to travel with them oops! :rolleyes:

There is one with Roundy when he was racing rallycross, the old TC ones, I remember butch telling me when all 4 of his tyres came off and just passed the car lol

[Stu]

Worcester 2001 - F3/4/5's.

Milz will remember, Mr Whittle & me trying to teach you a Burnley accent, playing Fat Harry White full blast at 1am, and vomitting very loudly - some of the local residents called the fuzz.

Kyron came over to see us the next morning and told us he would speak to 'The BRCA' about sending us home like naughty school kids, we were fairly worried for a but untill we realised that Kyron did not know our names so would only be able to dob-us-in as 'them-up-there'.
We took the tent down like it was on fire, packed boxes and went to pit with Kev Kitchen in the oppsite end of the field - we just kept our heads down all day, it worked a treat.

Batley 2002/3? - Tony Bishop was so pissed he went unconcious in the middle of the football pitch, had to be dragged to bed & threw up in his sleeping bag?

[Northy]

Stu getting lost at Batley pissed? ;)

Mr Wittle tells it best. :cool:

G

[albertobdq]

This is a story about proficiency in car maintenance...

A guy, a very enthusist one, was just cleaning and servicing his car between heats, rebulding most of the car. When he had finished just put a fresh batery and go running again.

Well, his car had very poor performance, no acceleration, no top speed... that was little extrange. After a few minutes he entered the boxes to verify everything.

Well, he wasn't able to find was wrong, bearings were superb, as ball diffs, motor, connections... everything, so he just figured out that batery didn't charge properly. He taked a new one and hit the track again.

This time, performance was even worse, nobody could understand why.

Desesperated this guy taked his car and started to put everything apart, he taked it to pieces completelly. Finally he found the reason for his poor performance. Are you seated?

He just forgot an allen wrench in the chassis first time he rebuild the car, this wrench produced a short-circuit when the battery was placed in the car. The wrench got so hot that it melted the molded chassis, so you can see the wrench semi-covered by melted plastic

[telboy]

I saw wayne lander (some might know him) glue his eye lid shut once :D

I have also seen him being escorted away from stafford by police:D

Yep, there for both events!!:D

The glue thing was at the 1998 world champ ITCC at south shields.
What a way to debut at the worlds?!:wtf:

[matt]

I was getting my car all sorted for racing on saturday befor i whent out for some beers with some mates. So i've glued some new tires on to my wheels with the runny glue while they were on my car, gave them a few sec and then for some reason i still don't know why i spun the car up with glue going in to my eye. Still whent out for some beers but the following morning i was woken up by the other half as there was all this white gunk over my eye and i could not open it:D

[dave g]

at southport national,we decided to go into town for a few beers,me and snee ended up in a nightclub with drescher and some ladies..staggered back to the tent at around 4 am...it was warm,so in my wisdom i decided i didnt need a tent or sleeping bag and just dragged the airbed outside..i looked like someone you see sleeping in shop doorways when morning arrived,someone put a tray with a few pennies in and sign up saying 'big issue',and a half eaten sausage roll was ontop of me (think it was G)

i was in a bad bad way hehe,i didnt race that day :(

and yes stu got lost,slept on a bench and someone had his wallet away

[emzy]

and yes stu got lost,slept on a bench and someone had his wallet away

... and then it got sent back a few weeks later!

Damo's better off telling that one...!

[millzy]

Worcester 2001 - F3/4/5's.

Milz will remember, Mr Whittle & me trying to teach you a Burnley accent, playing Fat Harry White full blast at 1am, and vomitting very loudly - some of the local residents called the fuzz.

Kyron came over to see us the next morning and told us he would speak to 'The BRCA' about sending us home like naughty school kids, we were fairly worried for a but untill we realised that Kyron did not know our names so would only be able to dob-us-in as 'them-up-there'.
We took the tent down like it was on fire, packed boxes and went to pit with Kev Kitchen in the oppsite end of the field - we just kept our heads down all day, it worked a treat.

Batley 2002/3? - Tony Bishop was so pissed he went unconcious in the middle of the football pitch, had to be dragged to bed & threw up in his sleeping bag?

hahah mate i remeber that i got so waisted with guys and made the A the next day, no one asked me to leave mind, never knew thats why you put your tent down

[Welshy40]

Dan, yes it was funny, and I never got to see the video either, but was still a good weekend. Colin Pitmans son (I cant remember his name) videod it.

In fact that was the weekend when Harris met Penny.

Harris may remember this. At the Basildon warm ups me and Harris were staying in a chalet not far from the track and we couldnt figure out where his cousin had vanished to.

So out we go in search of him only to spot him him in his ford fiesta with some bird going for it. Well we had had a few beers and decided to have a laugh, so we jumped from a bush onto the bonnet and watched Harris's cousins head hit the roof, must have hurt elsewhere as well for both of them hehehe.

Also the Radio Race car event after the world event, me and Dave Belsten were invading the hotel down the road and gatecrashed a wedding party, free booze and lots of lovely ladies, well we got caught out and got chucked out.

Jon Leonards dad wasnt impressed with us hehehe, neither when we were going home either when dave tryed offering his daughter some crips and coke whilst leaning out of the car window at 70 mph on the M4.

But when walking to the pub just down the gravel road from the hotel we had to see what was happening in a ford escort parked up as the windows were steamed up.

Dave goes along and rubs the window and all we can see is this fit bird with no clothes on being jumped by her bloke, still they were a bit shocked when Dave and I started shouting give her a good ramming very loudly, that they didnt even dress, just drove away totaly starkers hehehe.

We have done a lot worse, hehehe.

[PaulRotheram]

me falling flat on my back today.

what do i win lee?

[bigred5765]

it looked painfull u ok ??

[PaulRotheram]

sore back, it might be abit stiff in the morning (officer) but nothing a few painkillers wont sort out.

Just lucky it wasnt on the track marking or brenens car, otherwise it'd of been alot worse.

[GRIFF55]

It did look very stylish!!!:D

[emzy]

I can't believe I missed it...!

[millzy]

Oz best bits
simon spewing off a fart and bathys group pic that will need a perental warrning attachment

[Southwell]

me falling flat on my back today.

what do i win lee?

It was bound to happen to someone being that slippery.

[ollie]

Jimmy you have a PM.

[RLGfx]

Oswestry club night...

Racing against Doddy and Stan, and heard the call of "where's Rob"

My Reply - "I'm walking away with it"

Cue Mat and Stan stoppin and nailing my car off the track at every available opportunity...

I suppose it's one of those where you had to be there...

[Chris Elworthy]

Racing Tourers a few years ago at the Bolton club springs to mind. A member needed some diff lube for his Yokomo but was instead given polystyrene cement!!!! He went out for his run and couldn't understand what was going on, only the rest of the club were rolling around laughing. Even the race commentator was coming out with classics such as " you appear to be in a bit of a sticky situation there Gordon" hilarious!

Then on another occasion I was the butt of the joke when a large proportion of the club grabbed me and duck taped me to a wooden post for the whole meeting!!!!
I was annoyed at the time as you might imagine but its funny when you look back.

[Lee Martin]

hahaha duck tapped ya!!!

awesome!

i GOT to do tht....

my mates buddy was on his first day of work for a labour company.....just before they got in the van to go home they grabbed him.....gaffa taped him to the side of the van and drove it home with him on the sidE!!!

ace!!!

[Lee]

I saw something similar when i was on work experience, it was our last day and the Kwik fit garage accross the road had got a cheeky little s*it for the week so on the friday afternoon all we heard was screams, there was 4 fellas tieing this 15 year old to a flat back truck, they then stripped the poor lad off and greased up his balls and drove him round the town centre, i have never seen anyone cry so much:D

[Lee]

Another work related one:

Whilst working in aberdeen i met this mad welshman he was a legend but he left after six months to work nearer to home, he called me up to say how things were going and was telling me about this 46 page document he had to fill in about himself and and convictions he had,and a day long interview about it , i said he will be fine but he told me he had 2 accounts of indecent exposure:D

When i asked how he said the first one was at a rugby game and he got his arse out with all his mates which i thought they probably wouldnt mind about,

but then the second came:

It was late into a saturday night after an all day session when he and his mates were at a chippy and the woman threw him out for what ever reason, so he decided to wait outside for his mates but had a bright idea to bang on the window to attract the womans attention get his little welshman out and shout "hey love why dont you batter this" his mates were in hysterics but the female copper stood beside him was less than impressed:D

[GRIFF55]

As work ones go, I used to work for a bmw dealership. The day i was leaving, they stripped me down, locked me in a small cage, pressure washed me then covered me in food colouring and put me on the forecourt front to dry. Much to the amusement of customers and passers by!! Neadless to sy, one of the bast##ds also put a photo of this on every table at my wedding reception:mad: :D .
Never mind, REVENGE IS OOO SOOO SWEET!!:D

[Nick Goodall]

hahaha duck tapped ya!!!

awesome!

i GOT to do tht....

my mates buddy was on his first day of work for a labour company.....just before they got in the van to go home they grabbed him.....gaffa taped him to the side of the van and drove it home with him on the sidE!!!

ace!!!

Hahaha that would be Lance then ;-) They were so horrible to him, used to take his sandwiches off him first thing, they were Tree surgeons and actually even tied him in a tree for 5 hours one day....

Harsh harsh b**tards hahaha but even he laughs about it now

[Lee Martin]

thats who it was then!

i couldnt remeber lol

[elvo]

OK,

(in no particular order)

#1: at a euro's, must've been before 2000 because the Schumacher team was there, the race was repeatedly delayed. (Might have been in France, I think.) Our Team Manager brought in a new time table every 10 minutes or so, for every driver. Everyone was bored. Camp Germany and camp ... SomeOtherCountry started super glueing a coke can tower to their pit table, several metres high. We spontaneously rolled the paper sheets into blow pipes, and tried to attack their towers with paper arrows. Needless to say, lots of (unsuspecting) people got hit.


#2: I've experienced 2 distinct people clear out half the pit area by means of emitting toxic gas. The first event involved ... let's call him Lee's bodyguard. He was a little ill, having digestion problems. At one point, everybody promptly cleared the pit area, except for one German, who was blissfully unaware, and a few seconds later yelled "BIST DU INNEN VERLEGEN!!???" (Are you rotten inside?) loud enough for the entire audience to hear and ran out as well. The second event was at the euro's in Vienna last year. Several people wanted to run out, but were boxed in and couldn't reach the exit. They promptly crawled underneath the tent's side flaps into the fresh outside air, seriously soiling their clothes.

#3: At the Euro's - or the warmup - in Austria, camp Belgium set up Marc Rheinard ask Oscar Jansen "Wil je me pijpen?". (Dutch to English: will you give me oral pleasure?) The look on Oscar's face was priceless.

[Welshy40]

OK,

(in no particular order)

#1: at a euro's, must've been before 2000 because the Schumacher team was there, the race was repeatedly delayed. (Might have been in France, I think.) Our Team Manager brought in a new time table every 10 minutes or so, for every driver. Everyone was bored. Camp Germany and camp ... SomeOtherCountry started super glueing a coke can tower to their pit table, several metres high. We spontaneously rolled the paper sheets into blow pipes, and tried to attack their towers with paper arrows. Needless to say, lots of (unsuspecting) people got hit.


#2: I've experienced 2 distinct people clear out half the pit area by means of emitting toxic gas. The first event involved ... let's call him Lee's bodyguard. He was a little ill, having digestion problems. At one point, everybody promptly cleared the pit area, except for one German, who was blissfully unaware, and a few seconds later yelled "BIST DU INNEN VERLEGEN!!???" (Are you rotten inside?) loud enough for the entire audience to hear and ran out as well. The second event was at the euro's in Vienna last year. Several people wanted to run out, but were boxed in and couldn't reach the exit. They promptly crawled underneath the tent's side flaps into the fresh outside air, seriously soiling their clothes.

#3: At the Euro's - or the warmup - in Austria, camp Belgium set up Marc Rheinard ask Oscar Jansen "Wil je me pijpen?". (Dutch to English: will you give me oral pleasure?) The look on Oscar's face was priceless.

FANTASTIC, that beats me turning up to the BRCA evening dinner for the British Grand prix the night before with the Irish team totally hammered and eating fish and chips. We got chucked out. Hehe but Bob Gammon is a god as he knobbled the Danish (i think) champs missus in the toilets whilst her hubby was waiting outside. hehehe

[Lee]

I dont think he would want that displayed on a public forum, but well done to Rob, im partial to a bit of danish bacon too:D


Im sure the boys going to finland will have some fun, all the scandinavian women are up for it permanently. Fantastic!!;)

[Kopite]

Permanently?

[elvo]

24/7

[Kopite]

wouldn't they get a little sore at some point? :o

[Lee Martin]

my bodyguard?

[Lee]

No pidge, women only sorry;) :D